Dear New Mama

Newborn Mother

noun.

A recently born mother whose strength is in asking for support. She acknowledges that the birth of a mother is even more intense than childbirth, and that she is as sensitive and vulnerable as her new baby. Her heart is wide open and her needs are high. As she nourishes herself, she nourishes her children.

-Julia Jones

Dear New Mama,

It’s only been a week but your world has entirely changed! Your baby is here, and you barely have time to process the whirlwind of everything that is happening because your baby needs you almost every moment of every day, and that is so beautiful and so overwhelming. Who you were before and who you are becoming is an intangible swirl, and rightly so. Your body hurts in ways you didn’t know it could, you are probably exhausted in ways that you didn’t know were humanly possible, and yet your heart may be filled with a new love that is so fierce yet demands every ounce of you (and if it’s not, that’s okay too).  What a crazy transition on all levels! 

It is all so new and it comes with so many lows and highs. One day you can be filled with self-doubt or confusion – searching for how to do this, how to be this, and what is happening. The next day you may feel more confident – like you’re finding your stride and truly enjoying baby life. Some days are in between and sometimes this shift can happen even moment by moment. Everything has changed. These are all completely normal reactions to this brand-new journey.

You, new mama, are becoming a mother! Becoming a mother does not just happen once you see your baby’s face for the first time, or the moment you find out you’re pregnant. Becoming a mother is a journey. Becoming a mother unfolds within you as you make each and every choice, as you learn to love this new little one, as you learn to trust your intuition, and as you begin to integrate and care for this new little being in the way that makes the most sense to YOU as the mother.

Becoming a mother is also forged in each season of motherhood, adding more and more to who you are and what you give your children in each season of parenting. We as mothers can find our way though it is often new and unknown.

As a newborn mother, the focus is often on the baby. Yet I want to invite you to not forget to direct some of that attention inward, what would be possible if you did that? During the postpartum time, we are vulnerable and in need of nurturing ourselves. As part of your journey, search for these nurturing people, spaces, and sources and truly receive what they have to offer. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. Be so gentle with yourself, and know it’s normal to feel so many different feelings. Laugh. Cry. Allow and trust the journey.

As you give yourself to this process, there will be growing pains. But before you know it, you will look back and be a mother more effortlessly than you ever thought you could be. It will all be worth it. You got this!

Xo, Nicole